A cruise in the Pacific goes all wrong

[Guest EWC]

A cruise in the Pacific goes all wrong, the ship sinks, and there

were only 3 survivors; Damian, Darren and Deirdre.

 

 

They manage to swim to a small island and they lived there for a

couple of years doing what's natural for men and women to do.

 

After several years of casual sex, Deirdre found God and started

to feel horrible about what she had been doing with both Damian and

Darren. The shame grew and eventually she killed herself.

 

It was very tragic but Damian and Darren somehow managed to get

through it and after a while, nature once more took its inevitable

course.

 

Well, a couple more years went by and Damian and Darren began to

feel horrible about what they where doing.

 

So they buried her.

[Rick Munroe]

>They manage to swim to a small island and they lived there

>for a couple of years doing what's natural for men and women to do.

 

Hmmm...so what we gay men do together is unnatural? What is this, the 700 Club? :o

 

Btw...a joke about heterosexual necrophilia on a gay escort message board...what's wrong with this picture?

[Louis]

That reminds me of a joke I heard a long time ago.

 

There were two guys stuck on a desrted island..

After a few months the one guy told the other that he's kind of getting horny, and the other guy said the same was happening to him.

So the one guy asked the other if its ok to have sex with him. He told the guy he wasn't gay, and the other guy mentioned that he wasn't gay either but, what other choice do they have.

So the agreed who would bottom first. The one guy asked the other how he would know if he's hurting him, or enjoying it. So the bottom guy told him that if he's making a barnyard sound he is not enjoying it, and to stop. If he sings then keep on going, because he's liking it.

So anyways the top starts going at it and the bottom guy goes MOO......

MOOO....................

 

 

MOOOOOOOON RIVER....:-)

[Guest EWC]

>>They manage to swim to a small island and they lived there

>>for a couple of years doing what's natural for men and women

>to do.

>

>Hmmm...so what we gay men do together is unnatural? What is

>this, the 700 Club? :o

>

>Btw...a joke about heterosexual necrophilia on a gay escort

>message board...what's wrong with this picture?

 

Odd: The joke implies that sex is natural for men and women, and then later it implies (until the punch line) that sex is natural for men and men. Why would you assume that the joke is in some way homophobic. What does that sort of defensiveness say about you?

 

Very Odd: That simply because this is a primarily a gay web site that a joke of whichever (gay or straight) persuasion wouldn't be welcome. It occurs to me that we all need a chuckle however derived. I don't think we need be exclusionist.

[Lookin]

As long as we're talking desert island jokes, here's one of my faves. It's definitely from a straight guy's point of view, but I think it's funny. Hope you do too. (It probably wouldn't be that hard to rewrite, featuring me and Rick Munroe, but I'm just off for a walk around the island. ;-))

 

 

A young single guy is on a cruise ship, having the time of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into an iceberg and begins to sink.

 

Passengers around him are screaming, flailing, and drowning but our guy manages to grab on to a piece of driftwood and, using every last ounce of strength, swims a few miles through the shark-infested sea to a remote island. Sprawled on the shore nearly passed out from exhaustion, he turns his head and sees a woman lying near him, unconscious, barely breathing. She has also managed to wash up on shore from the sinking ship.

 

He makes his way to her, and with some mouth-to-mouth assistance he manages to get her breathing again. She looks up at him, wide-eyed and grateful and says, "My God, you saved my life!"

 

He suddenly realizes the woman is Cindy Crawford! Days and weeks go by. Cindy and our guy are living on the island together. They have set up a hut, there is fruit on the trees, and they are in heaven. Cindy has fallen madly in love with our man, and they are making passionate love morning, noon and night.

 

Alas, one day she notices he is looking kind of glum. "What’s the matter, sweetheart?" she asks, "We have a wonderful life together, I am in love with you. Is there something wrong? Is there anything I can do?"

 

He says, "Actually, Cindy, there is. Would you mind, putting on my shirt?"

 

"Sure," she says, "if it will help."

 

He takes off his shirt and she puts it on. "Now would you put on my pants?" he asks.

 

"Sure, honey, if it is really going to make you feel better," she says.

 

"Okay, would you put on my hat now, and draw a little moustache on your face?" he asks.

 

"Whatever you want, sweetie," she says, and does what he asks.

 

Then he says, "Now, would you start walking around the edge of the island?"

 

She starts walking around the perimeter of the island. He sets off in the other direction. They meet up half way around the island a few minutes later... He rushes up to her, grabs her by the shoulders, and says, "Dude! You will never believe who I am sleeping with!"

[jackhammer91406]

OK, that made me chuckle.

[Rick Munroe]

>Odd: The joke implies that sex is natural for men and women,

>and then later it implies (until the punch line) that sex is

>natural for men and men.

 

Well, actually, the second part of the joke, before the punchline, implies that gay sex is wrong...that it is something that makes you "feel horrible about what you're doing."

 

>Why would you assume that the joke

>is in some way homophobic. What does that sort of

>defensiveness say about you?

 

I think it says that I'm aware of the homophobia that pervades our culture in subtle ways.

 

>Very Odd: That simply because this is a primarily a gay web

>site that a joke of whichever (gay or straight) persuasion

>wouldn't be welcome.

 

I never said it wasn't welcome or that you shouldn't have posted it. I said, "What's wrong with this picture?" with a smiley face. Are you saying that I shouldn't be allowed to comment and express my opinion?

[Rick Munroe]

>So anyways the top starts going at it and the bottom guy goes

>MOO......

>MOOO....................

>

>

>MOOOOOOOON RIVER....:-)

 

I never knew Andy Williams was gay! Now what does that say about Claudine Longet? Hmmmm...

[Rick Munroe]

>(It probably

>wouldn't be that hard to rewrite, featuring me and Rick

>Munroe

 

Funny! How would you rewrite it? Would I have to dress up like Cindy Crawford and walk the perimeter?

 

The ending reminds me of my favorite Madeline Kahn quote from Young Frankenstein: "Oh, you men are all alike. Seven or eight quick ones and then you're out with the boys to boast and brag. YOU BETTER KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. Oh...I think I love him."