I can only base my thoughts on what is presented thus far, but I could think of the following:
Should the primary question be really about taking legal action or not? It sounds like he did 2 terrible things:
Outed you to your family: this happened. you are immeasurably hurt by this.
Placed a retraining order against you: would you even care to be anywhere close to him?
Regardless of what he did and whether there is closure from him, can you forgive him? Forgiveness is not necessarily just for the person asking for it (which does not sound like your ex would be doing anytime soon) but it would be for you to lift up whatever emotional burden and scar the actions have potentially consumed your life. I think when you get to this point, the rest of your next steps might be a lot clearer. Certainly way easier said than done, but I think a very important step to move on.
I would probably heed the advice of the people closest to you - I think they are (or should be) looking out for your welfare.