liubit, I am glad you found the compromise that works for your relationship. I too was in a non-convention relationship for 22 years and it worked fine, so I do agree with most of your comment. The only thing I would like to understand more is how the "money" aspect of your extra-curricular makes any difference ? Outside sex is still sex, whether paid or free, so not sure I would agree that ONLY paid sex be allowed. but then again, its the personal way you fine-tune your arrangement, and congrats on making things work !