(humiliating topic ... please be gentle)
I am very new to exploring my sexuality ... have been in the closet (and therefore celibate ) all my life. Lately I have started enjoying the replacement of intimacy by getting erotic massages.
I love when the masseur touches my hole ... but I do not have a smooth / "flat" / tight one ... it's kind of swollen and puffy. I am not sure if it is a hemorrhoid: it's not painful or itchy and does not bother me at all ... except I'm just wondering: is it off-putting to other guys and should I be embarrassed by it?
