Jason Dutch

There's something intriguing here for sure but frankly I'm having a really hard time following the story at all... you don't explain what was or wasn't said, nor what did or didn't happen, or exactly what made them so different or unsatisfying...?
If I'm interpreting it right, though, you're saying he talked a great game over text, but when you met up, he did not behave in line with what you expected and the skill/chemistry was not there in person... And you're asking if there's a way to tell if someone is going to be as enticing and attuned to your needs IRL as they seem during the prelude.
Sucks what happened to you and I don't think it's unusual to try to figure out ways of preventing disappointments or unexpected mismatches like this. Uncomfortable, expensive, and confusing is not the experience anyone wants going into meeting a provider (or, from our end, a client), or even a hook up, date, acquaintance, whatever. For me personally, excessive (and especially impatient) texting habits are a huge red flag for me. Frequently acts as some sort of cover, or overcompensation or anxiety of some kind that becomes clearer down the line.. However, I've noticed generally that many many people under 30 are much more comfortable and confident in themselves when they are mediated through texting, social media platforms, etc. and then come off as shy, awkward, or tactless in person, especially a first meeting... So maybe try not to get too caught up in their deft messaging skills. One solution would be to try to get them to speak on the phone first to get a better sense of their conversational graces, but gooooood luck trying to get a Gen Z anywhere near such a thing.
(Yikes, guess I'm a boomer now haha. To be fair, anyone can turn out to be very different from the image they portray of themselves)
 
 

Strike now or strike later, I am very serious about starting a hustlers union. There are a many SW-led advocacy projects and even some self-styled unions that are mostly women. We should definitely be organizing to build collective power ( issues of labour, criminalization, violence/exploitation, stigma and health, and I believe part of that could mean building worker run platforms/collaboratives that serve us rather than the profit driven sites we are stick with. In the amateur porn sphere for example we have Justfor.fans which is owned and staffed my models/SWers. We could all be better off bu pooling our resources / labour power to secure much needed rights, standards, and more dignified ways of working. 
Alas, Right now, male SW solidarity remains uncommon and decentralized. The scarcity mentality driven by RM and similar sites (compounded by state criminalization, widespread societal scorn, neoliberal capitalism in general and most recently, our global payment processing overlords) pits us against each other as competitors, fracturing our ability to push for changes  and generally driving standards down.  Imagine what happens when we can meaningfully harness our collective influence so far but I feel like we are on the precipice of changing that.
 
Taking control of our working conditions doesn’t stop at the platforms either,  in my eyes. We would all be better off if a critical mass of providers can establish (or at least push toward) some shared minimum rates/service for example. Lets expand on and safety systems like bad date books, screening tools (much more common for women/femme SWers I have observed) and safety check in systems. We could develop regional networks for mutual aid and travel support/exchange, create infrastructure kn our terms…there’s so much we could do!
 
We are talking and planning about this sometimes in a private forum I run for/with other guys. Providers (and I mean providers only please) DM me if interested.