Neologisms

[Karl-G]

The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to

take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

 

Here are this year's winners.

 

Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

 

Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of

getting laid.

 

Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject

financially impotent for an indefinite period.

 

Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

 

Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the

person who doesn't get it.

 

Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

 

Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.

 

Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

 

Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these

really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's

like, a serious bummer.

 

Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming

only things that are good for you.

 

Glibido (v): All talk and no action.

 

Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when

they come at you rapidly.

 

Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've

accidentally walked through a spider web.

 

Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your

bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

 

Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the

fruit you're eating.

 

And the pick of the literature:

 

Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an ass.

[VaHawk]

I always read the Style Invitational, but I much preferred the Czar to the Empress. Seems like its always the same people who get posted over and over and over. In keeping with the spirit of this site:

 

whorse - a male prostitute whose boner is 11" or more and who will leave you with a raspy voice after deep throating him.

 

As you can tell, I'll never win.

[+ Hoover42]

Good one, VA. Three definitions in one!