Help Me Understand the Mentality...

[ErieBear]

I was just reading a blog post from a gay porn star. He was quite upset because someone had emailed him and asked him if he escorted. He got quite irate about the whole and declared pretty vehemently that he isn't an escort.

 

Can someone help me understand why anyone would be that opposed to escorting and yet okay with doing porn? I can understand if he just said, "I'm sorry, I don't do that." But to get quite pissed off about it seems strange.

 

Thanks.

 

EB

[josephga]

Some do get very upset. I do understand all they have to do is say no. I also feel when they do say no it should be left at that. But that's not good enough for some they want to argue about it or wanting an explanation to why no. Like I have said in other posts imo NO doesn't req a explanation

[jjkrkwood]

I was just reading a blog post from a gay porn star. He was quite upset because someone had emailed him and asked him if he escorted. He got quite irate about the whole and declared pretty vehemently that he isn't an escort.

 

Can someone help me understand why anyone would be that opposed to escorting and yet okay with doing porn? I can understand if he just said, "I'm sorry, I don't do that." But to get quite pissed off about it seems strange.

 

Thanks.

 

EB

 

Its sort of a hierarchy of class perception, whereby its OK to do porn because thats "actting", while being and escort is perceived as low class and considered illegal in most places. Many porn stars separate themselves from escorts in that way, but basically BOTH are really doing the same thing simply in different context.

[josephga]

I read one guys blog once I believe it was brent corrigan He said just because someone does porn doesn't make them available to everyone. I saw a documentary once where Blake harper got very upset and was crying because some guy in a club put his hands on him. He said doing porn was a job not a life style and just because he did porn didn't welcome just anyone to put their hands on him..

[jjkrkwood]

I read one guys blog once I believe it was brent corrigan He said just because someone does porn doesn't make them available to everyone. I saw a documentary once where Blake harper got very upset and was crying because some guy in a club put his hands on him. He said doing porn was a job not a life style and just because he did porn didn't welcome just anyone to put their hands on him..

 

Well escorts are usually discretionary in who they choose to interact with. Unless being an escort is viewed as a "working the streets" profession, I see no diff between it and porn.

[whipped guy]

Escorting is bad... other activities are OK... another take...

 

Funny how "escorting" gets a bad name! I was at a certain club, was talking to the club's owner, and mentioned escorting. He got quite agitated with me and said he was appalled and disgusted by the whole escort scene… and used the word wh*re in a very disparaging manner. Yet, he was running a place that probably made what most escorts do look quite innocent and tame in comparison! Dare I say exponentially tame in comparison! Plus, only a month or so previously a certain escort had frequented his establishment while I was there and this same person was having quite an interaction with him… I guess ignorance is indeed bliss!

 

Incidentally, since that exchange I have visited this establishment quite often and even at times in the company of an escort. Of course when I would introduce the escort to this individual as being a friend I always had a sly smile on my face! In fact, I know that he was quite taken with one good looker that I was there with. So much so that the first thing that he said breathlessly to me the next time I was there was, “Where’s your friend!?”

 

Needless to say, I didn’t tell him who my “friend” was and what he just might be up to...

[jjkrkwood]

Funny how "escorting" gets a bad name! I was at a certain club, was talking to the club's owner, and mentioned escorting. He got quite agitated with me and said he was appalled and disgusted by the whole escort scene… and used the word wh*re in a very disparaging manner. Yet, he was running a place that probably made what most escorts do look quite innocent and tame in comparison! Dare I say exponentially tame in comparison! Plus, only a month or so previously a certain escort had frequented his establishment while I was there and this same person was having quite an interaction with him… I guess ignorance is indeed bliss!

 

Incidentally, since that exchange I have visited this establishment quite often and even at times in the company of an escort. Of course when I would introduce the escort to this individual as being a friend I always had a sly smile on my face! In fact, I know that he was quite taken with one good looker that I was there with. So much so that the first thing that he said breathlessly to me the next time I was there was, “Where’s your friend!?”

 

Needless to say, I didn’t tell him who my “friend” was and what he just might be up to...

 

Well I wish I could get paid for having sex with guys. As I approach retirement, I am thinking of opening a "drive thru" like blowjob establishment for those busy guys on the go that need a quickie... Come by, drop trou, insert, thrust, release, pay, GO !. The perfect service for the busy man on the go..... Low overhead, and word of mouth (pun) advertising...

[josephga]

I thought about opening up a glory hole service. Id smile greet the guys say now honey stick your cock in and I'll do the rest. id have a homeless guy on the other side to do the work and pay him like 5.00 a pop lol

[JackTwist]

Its sort of a hierarchy of class perception, whereby its OK to do porn because thats "actting", while being and escort is perceived as low class.

 

You are correct about this public perception. But perception is not reality, as you know. Living in Weho, I've met more than my fair-share of porn stars and escorts. Trust me, there are tons more professional "high-class" escorts than there are "high class" porn stars.

[jjkrkwood]

I thought about opening up a glory hole service. Id smile greet the guys say now honey stick your cock in and I'll do the rest. id have a homeless guy on the other side to do the work and pay him like 5.00 a pop lol

 

OK, so I think if we pool our resources Jos, we might have a hit on our hands ? "Blow-n-Go"

[Guest countryboywny]

Its sort of a hierarchy of class perception, whereby its OK to do porn because thats "actting", while being and escort is perceived as low class and considered illegal in most places. Many porn stars separate themselves from escorts in that way, but basically BOTH are really doing the same thing simply in different context.

 

I think you hit the nail on the head, JJ. However, as I said in another thread, MY perception is that escorts outclass porn models by a long shot! My thinking is that anyone with a nice body and a big dick can do porn, but it takes MUCH more intelligence and personality and work to escort successfully. IMHO, of course.

[Phil_musc]

This has been discussed here before - of course, after all, there is nothing new under the sun and that certainly goes for Daddy's too. Still, these two professions, while drawing on some superficial similarities, are in fact quite different and I imagine the talents and special abilities that make for a successful escort are not the same as a porn actor. Think about it for a sec: if things aren't right in a porn set, you can always do another take. Not the same in the escort situation.

 

JJ I think you may be onto something there with your Blow-'n'-Go business venture, If it catches on might I propose you consider taking it national - a sort of franchise, if you will. Maybe a promising hedge against inflation and diminishing social security benefits. It you go national, please PM me - I'd consider an investment opportunity.

[Bosguy]

Funny how "escorting" gets a bad name! I was at a certain club, was talking to the club's owner, and mentioned escorting. He got quite agitated with me and said he was appalled and disgusted by the whole escort scene… and used the word wh*re in a very disparaging manner. Yet, he was running a place that probably made what most escorts do look quite innocent and tame in comparison! Dare I say exponentially tame in comparison! Plus, only a month or so previously a certain escort had frequented his establishment while I was there and this same person was having quite an interaction with him… I guess ignorance is indeed bliss!

 

Incidentally, since that exchange I have visited this establishment quite often and even at times in the company of an escort. Of course when I would introduce the escort to this individual as being a friend I always had a sly smile on my face! In fact, I know that he was quite taken with one good looker that I was there with. So much so that the first thing that he said breathlessly to me the next time I was there was, “Where’s your friend!?”

 

Needless to say, I didn’t tell him who my “friend” was and what he just might be up to...

 

You are so right WG. Last year I planned a vacation to visit my friend of 30+ years and his partner. I was meeting a well respected working guy for part of my stay. I guess my "friend" assumed it was a bf. When he and his partner became aware of the fact he was a working guy, the invitation was dropped because thes people were "prostitutes who would rob you". I was floored beyond belief and made alternate plans and I had a wonderful time with my guy.

 

For 2 gay men to make a statement like that about a profession, a person they did not know, and my character was one of the most troubling moments I have had as a gay man. I have not spoken to these men since. I will be returning to this area in the near future with a phenomenal professional guy and, unfortunately for this degrading attitude, will not be contacting them.

 

Thank goodness for the wonderful, positive guys of the Forum.

 

Boston Bill

[instudiocity]

This has been discussed here before - of course, after all, there is nothing new under the sun and that certainly goes for Daddy's too. Still, these two professions, while drawing on some superficial similarities, are in fact quite different and I imagine the talents and special abilities that make for a successful escort are not the same as a porn actor. Think about it for a sec: if things aren't right in a porn set, you can always do another take. Not the same in the escort situation.

You got that RIGHT! My favorites escorts have a personality. Ain't seen no porn movie yet with anything close.

 

FYI, if someone wants to start the thread - I HATE WATCHING PORN! I follow the Five Senses Rule for Sex. I want to involve all five senses in sex. I don't want to see and hear it if I can't TOUCH IT, SMELL IT, AND TASTE IT!

[instudiocity]

For 2 gay men to make a statement like that about a profession, a person they did not know, and my character was one of the most troubling moments I have had as a gay man. I have not spoken to these men since.

Isn't that the definition of INTOLORENCE?

[KMEM]

Isn't that the definition of INTOLORENCE?

 

By the two gay guys?

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[ErieBear]

Thanks all for the comments. It definitely makes a bit more sense (in a very warped way) than it did before.

[TruthBTold]

You are so right WG. Last year I planned a vacation to visit my friend of 30+ years and his partner. I was meeting a well respected working guy for part of my stay. I guess my "friend" assumed it was a bf. When he and his partner became aware of the fact he was a working guy, the invitation was dropped because thes people were "prostitutes who would rob you". I was floored beyond belief and made alternate plans and I had a wonderful time with my guy.

 

For 2 gay men to make a statement like that about a profession, a person they did not know, and my character was one of the most troubling moments I have had as a gay man. I have not spoken to these men since. I will be returning to this area in the near future with a phenomenal professional guy and, unfortunately for this degrading attitude, will not be contacting them.

 

Thank goodness for the wonderful, positive guys of the Forum.

 

Boston Bill

 

Good for you. Actually, the guy who I usually see is not that much younger than me so that people would assume he is my boyfriend unless I told them otherwise.

 

As for porn stars, the fact that they think they are one step above escorts is ridiculous. Getting paid to provide sex is getting paid to provide sex. The fact it is being seen by more to be viewed by even more later does not exactly elevate it in the moral stratosphere.

[+ Travis69]

Maybe one or both of the 2 guys feared they might already "know" the escort you were bringing....

[Steven_Draker]

Unless being an escort is viewed as a "working the streets" profession, I see no diff between it and porn.

 

I beg to differ.

 

There IS a difference. This has been discussed many times. May I suggest performing a search.

[jjkrkwood]

I beg to differ.

 

There IS a difference. This has been discussed many times. May I suggest performing a search.[/color]

 

I suppose you WANT me to see a difference ? In my mind, all parties are getting PAID to perform and have sex on demand. Its as simple as that to me. The minutia details are insignificant IMO. Of course, you as an escort have a different perspective, and thats fine. No need for me do do any searches, but thanks for the suggestion.

[Phil_musc]

Before this turns nasty (and I see it teetering precariously on the brink) I refer you to my earlier posting here: if a scene for a porn actor doesn't go well, they can re-shoot it, re-light it, etc. For an escort it's a one-shot time (no pun intended) - you can't do a retake.

 

Then too there is the skill of relating to the client as compared to relating to another porn actor (where is the challenge in that, I ask you) who is probably at least somewhat good looking and appealing (although I've seen some porn that reinforces the idea the America is still the land of opportunity; if some of those guys who get in from of the camera with their mediocre charms are paid, then there is a niche for all of us to start our own production companies with ourselves as the stars).

[jjkrkwood]

Before this turns nasty (and I see it teetering precariously on the brink) I refer you to my earlier posting here: if a scene for a porn actor doesn't go well, they can re-shoot it, re-light it, etc. For an escort it's a one-shot time (no pun intended) - you can't do a retake.

 

Then too there is the skill of relating to the client as compared to relating to another porn actor (where is the challenge in that, I ask you) who is probably at least somewhat good looking and appealing (although I've seen some porn that reinforces the idea the America is still the land of opportunity; if some of those guys who get in from of the camera with their mediocre charms are paid, then there is a niche for all of us to start our own production companies with ourselves as the stars).

 

Firstly Phil, you misjudged. There was no "brink of nasty" intended here, merely a statement of opinion, of which there are apparently different camps.

 

I am sure if you asked the porn actor, he will tell you there is alot of skill involved in what HE does. Even if his partner is attractive, if there is a lack of chemistry, there is effort involved in him making the scene realistic and believable and Hot . I hire escorts, and respect them and what they do, but lets face it, these guys are not doctors, lawyers, scientists etc. they are sex workers and although there is obviously skill involved in what they do, lets not put them on such HIGH pedestals, and I dont say that with aNY disresepct. There may be differences between porn actors and escorts, but those differences hardly deserve debate IMO. and FYI Phil, these comments are being made in the best of spirits, with a smile on my face and not intended to cause any hard feeling..

[whipped guy]

A couple of observations...

 

these guys are not doctors, lawyers, scientists etc. they are sex workers...

Interestinly, I have hired quite a few escorts who have earned post-graduate degrees... and that includes several who were lawyers... Accordingly, they as well as others who work in the field are indeed worthy of at least a modicum of respect.

 

...with ourselves as the stars).

Interestingly, the first time I did BDSM professionally with an escort who was a specialist in the field the first thought that I had was, "Wow! This is like staring in your own personal porno flick!"

 

Then upon reflection I decided that it was actually better than porn... and in truth much better than mere porn! As for the escort, he was hotter than any person I had seen in any porn and definitely infinitely more skilled as well.

 

Still, lets just say that both professions require somewhat different (if very related) skills... and I have indeed hired a couple of porn stars over the years and have been more than quite satisfied... so some can certainly be successful and feel quite comfortable with both occupations.

[Steven_Draker]

Never Argue With A Fool

 

"Do you feel like every time you get involved in an argument, you have got to win? If you know that someone is wrong, and you have a solution, do you feel like, you’ve to argue with them until they embrace your point? You can try, but if the person you’re arguing with is a fool, you will be hitting your head against a rock! It won’t work.

 

You don’t need to win an argument. If someone doesn’t want to listen to you, leave them be. If you tell them your point, and they don’t want to listen, keep quiet and let it go! I admit there are some who need a little convincing to get your point, but there are those who are simply fools, who take pride in arguing; believing they are always right. Don’t waste your time with those.

 

I’ll admit, there are some arguments that are constructive, when both parties are seeking a solution. Those kinds of arguments are rewarding. Both parties will be helping each other to come out with a better solution. But, in most cases, people argue for the sake of arguing. Arguing for the sake of arguing, is a waste of time.

 

There are people in this world you just need to ignore if they behave or act in a foolish manner. They take pride in making other people angry. They enjoy winning arguments no matter how wrong or ignorant they might be. Some of them know which buttons to press to get you angry, and if you decide to argue with them, you’ll be heading towards their trap.

 

Fools like to see you getting angry, swearing, speaking negative words or getting involved in a fight with them. They do what they do fully aware that they’re tickling you to get upset. Trying to argue with those guys, thinking they might get your point or understand how you do things, will not work. Don’t try to prove anything to them. Your only solution is to watch, listen, observe and keep your mouth shut.

 

If you feel tempted to answer to a fool, don’t do it. Ignore them, even if you feel like screaming to them. Your silence will prevent you from converting to their cult of foolishness. If you argue with a fool, you’ll become a fool just like them, and you’ll make a fool of yourself!

 

IT IS BEST TO BE THOUGHT A FOOL….THEN SPEAK AND REMOVE ALL DOUBT……

 

Learn a great habit of keeping your mouth shut whenever a fool is in front of you. Let them do the talking, and you do the ignoring!"