LA Culture

[Guest IM_Moore]

So you have come to the land of make believe for the first time. You have heard all those stories about how tough Los Angeles can be. You are here to take in the country's cutest (and most plastic) guys plus you want to experience the LA culture. Maybe an earthquake, flood, fire, home invasion robbery, follow me home robbery, follow me home killing, freeway shooting, freeway killing, bank take over robbery, simple bank robbery (for those who have heart conditions this one is recommended oer the bank take over robbery), some gang violence, gang rellated shooting, wrong turn killing, car jacking (west coast style whereas unlike the east coast our car jackers like to kill the owner of the vehicle first then drag their dead weighted body out of the vehicle before actually taking the car), meet of the cool serial killers we are infmaous for (the most in the country), we even have/had serial killers with cool names, like the two gay guys who killed a bunch of young boys, I kid you not their last names were Bonin and Butts! ..... naturally I find all of the above really sick, yet it is reality here!

 

... or lets say simply take a walk across Hollywood Blvd. Hey you think it is easy ... read these survival tips.

 

First bring 3 T-Shirts with you, One red, blue and white. Be sure to wear black pants. When exiting you vehicle from the west side of the Blvd be sure to have your blue T-shirt on as you will be in the Crypts area. As you slowly make your way to the middle of the street do not panic, first you can take your time because an LA driver could be cruising at 100 mph and still break in time, next you will need time to slip that white T shirt out of your pocket and slowly put it on once you hit the double yellow lines. This is a good time to take a deep breath or two as well. You are halfway there ... don't mind those pooping sounds you are hearing, they are not exactly car's backfiring, more like gun fire, though white shirt, black slacks, middle of the road, you're safe. Now as you step off those yellow lines rip that white T shirt off and place the red one on very quickly ... as you are now entering the Bloods turf. Proceed calmly to the sidewalk .

 

... if you are still standing you have made it! Now you have a legit LA experience toshare with your pals.

[Guest EWC]

This isn't the LA Culture, this is the LA nightlife.

EWC