Big Dad Energy Thoughts

[BeamerBikes]

Kicking around thoughts about going from rudderless in my late teens to buckling down into Big Dad energy. It’s not quite “Daddy” stereotype, but when Big Dad energy shows up, it doesn’t need rank, suit, or some fancy introduction. Competence has entered the chat. Shit got serious long ago. Now it’s time to sort out and put in the work. Not the quick fix work either. The work that will test your commitment. You will fail in the commitments you made to yourself. You will beat yourself up over it, and recommit because that’s what you do. 

An experience with a surgeon at Northwestern exemplifies that. He’s not the chief of the department. He doesn’t boast of his accomplishments. However, when shit went sideways, Big Dad energy showed up, and put in the work. “These things sometimes happen, but they happen to my team only once”  With that statement, acknowledged problem, took ownership, provides assurance. 

I often crack jokes far too often in the professional setting. I try to keep things light. I did the same during my hospital stays. Because when the mood turns serious, it’s time to put in the work. A coworker once observed that Big Dad energy. Irate client - technology not responding as expected - read the room saw he needed a lifeline and now wasn’t the time to teach - “Hey, do you mind if I drive for a bit?” Instantly, focus on me, irate client still irate, (in my head, “keep this up shithead, and it will stay fucked until Tuesday out of spite” - outwardly, “putting in the work”) Resolved the issue. Advised coworker afterwards what I did and what led me to that solution. Assured them they would have gotten the solution if the client wasn’t adding unneeded pressure.

Big Dad energy doesn’t need to boast. It shows up puts in the work, and tries to leave the situation better than he found it. It doesn’t always work. That’s why your dad gets quiet a lot or sometimes drinks. 😉  It’s also why hearing a dad voice their pride is high praise.  

Also - some biological fathers never mature into dads. Some dads never were biological fathers. 
Big Dad energy on display - no time to play politics, no time to sugar coat, time to put in the work.  

[BeamerBikes]

Also a collary - you can fuck them or you can mentor them. You. Can’t. Do. Both. 
Hence, “Daddy” is an easily imitated stereotype.  
Big Dad Energy - aims for results - not for himself but in others.