I say that he is Bound Gods type BDSM Kink material... No script required other than the usual "Yes sir!" Thank you sir" and various screams from the "pleasure" of it all. Plus he would be tied up, used, and abused in what ever position required so he would not even have to remember that part of the script.
Also, if Mr. Ducati is not available, willing, or able I am quite sure that many others would be more than happy to offer their services to get Speedo Boy back on track.
Of course If he messes that up there's always the take out window at Micky D's. Though that might tax him a bit as suggested.