that's the way it should be! Unfortunately so many flakes on both sides of the table make it difficult for escorts and clients to trust each other.
I'm surprised you only had a few bad experiences with guys you hired out of blue.
Considering you were hiring folks you never met did you share your stats with them? Some younger in great shape guys (like most escorts are) aren't into all kinds of men.
Btw if someone is a dead fish in the bed... just take charge and fuck him face down! Dead fishes are good for that!