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I’ve had this happen. I think I’ve written about it previously but I’ll mention it again here because it’s relevant. I did an outcall one time to a client and his young daughter was with him when he answered the door. In fact we used the room she had been playing in for the massage. The client had intended we use a garage (integral to the house, a townhouse over 3 stories) but it wasn’t suitable so he moved the session to the ground floor play / tv room. As I was setting up the table he asked her to “go upstairs to mummy while daddy has his massage”…. Once she was gone I checked with him that he understood the nature of the service, as in we’d both be naked and it would include sexual activity and he confirmed all ok. He’d clearly seen my advertising etc so couldn’t have been in doubt but given his wife and daughter were upstairs and knew he was having a massage I did wonder… What’s worse is he didn’t even lock the door and during the session I could hear them upstairs. I asked him if this was ok and he was adamant we’d not be disturbed. I didn’t meet the wife, or daughter again fortunately as I think it would be even worse to see them afterwards. The client behaved like it was all routine…maybe it was a turn on for him because it certainly didn’t seem to inhibit him…he was hard as soon as he got naked. I really don’t mind if there’s others in an adjacent room. I’m also fine if they know what’s going on. I’ve done live shows and workshops including having full sex and things like being a demo model for the use of sex toys so it’s not a problem to me. I also have clients who are married and they both have massages from me while the other one watches. However in every situation it’s been agreed beforehand. It’s just polite and respectful to ask, and of course some situations such as the one above where I knew his daughter was upstairs are very disconcerting. He should have told me that might be the case when booking. I think that for most people they want discretion and privacy in such situations. If you as a client have any circumstances where your place isn’t going to be private then it’s best to let your provider know then he can decide. The default expectation both ways is of privacy.
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When the provider shows up in my social media...
Jamie21 replied to alrajee's topic in Questions About Hiring
I’d say it’s more likely that his clients are fellow members of the clergy… -
I do that now!! Plus I decant the lube I buy into smaller secure bottles and then keep all the stuff that might leak (masssge oil, toy cleaner) in ziplock bags. If I’m bottoming then I don’t mind what lube he uses. If I’m top then I prefer silicon based lube (or cum of course …that’s best!). I’m cut so I also prefer to use a little lubricant when wanking.
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Jamie21 reacted to a post in a topic: Recommendation needed for lube
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It’s true. Makes it taste sweet. Don’t let him eat Asparagus though, that makes it taste really yuck.
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Jamie21 reacted to a post in a topic: Another Theme On Deposits
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Always takes two to make a market: demand and supply.
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Wow and I believed them all when they said they were virgins.
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You’re very strict! I understand why given the model you operate. My model is different so I can go along with it a few times because it doesn’t cause me any hassle (they cancel before the day so I’m not incurring costs etc. By the third time they cancel with some lame excuse I usually say to them that if they’re anxious then to talk to me. These clients tend to be inhibited, usually not out, often exploring their sexuality. Their chat reveals they have a lot of misconceptions about gay or bi sex. I don’t want to be difficult to them; one day they might actually pluck up the courage to come for a session and that would be fantastic for them. I like helping clients with their sexuality and helping them to be comfortable with their sexuality. Those kind of clients are lovely because they’re so appreciative of what you do for them.
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It would be fine, he can do that. Usually people that book that far in advance are serious and they plan very well so it’s unlikely they’ll cancel unless their travel plans change. Obviously the he earlier I know the better. If he cancelled an hour before I’d be pissed of course but to counter that happening I always message clients the day before the session to make sure they are still all ok and if it’s a new client I’ll also message on the day with “see you later” as a further reminder. If I don’t get a response to that (or at least see that it’s been read) then I’ll follow up with a message to check he’s still ok. If those pre meeting messages are ignored and it’s a new client then I’ll cancel it and assume he won’t show. My time waster radar is highly tuned now so I can usually sift out these types before it even gets to a booking being made. Most of these are the ones who like the idea of a session (usually when they’re horny) and so they book it ….but then when it comes to the day of the session they get anxious and either don’t show or they come up with some excuse to cancel. The pre meeting reminder messages I send tends to be effective with these guys. Plus they tend to try again a year or so later (they forget they were in contact!) but I keep the records so I know they got cold feet previously. There’s a few like that who clearly build up the horn to book a session every year or so and then who cancel it with some excuse when the reality hits home! I find it amusing because when they book they’re clearly running some fantasy in their head “I want you to do x and x to me, I want to have y and z etc….I’m definitely going to be a regular…I love big cocks, I’m very tight etc etc”. Then the day before they message with “sorry Jamie my mother’s cat died…my car has a flat tyre…I’ve got Covid…I’ll rebook soon etc”. Then I hear nothing from him for a year or so until it happens again 😂.
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Is there recourse for getting back a deposit from a provider?
Jamie21 replied to steve's topic in Questions About Hiring
Sorry but it’s gone. You fell for his talk. There’s lots of debate on here about deposits, so I won’t add to it but I will say that if you’re given a ‘family crisis’ type story to justify sending money then the best and only sensible thing to do is say “I hope things work out for you” and then end the conversation and find a more professional provider. -
At the moment I have clients booked in for July. One of those booked it 2 months ago. Those guys plan ahead! 🙂
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How often do you do freebies, after clients or when biz is quiet?
Jamie21 replied to Jarrod_Uncut's topic in The Lounge
Casual sex is very different to paid sex for me. If I’m being paid, I’m not thinking of my enjoyment (except that I enjoy his enjoyment of it). I’m working so I’m thinking of time, what he likes, what might I do next, and if it’s for porn I’m thinking of camera angles etc. It’s definitely not recreational. With casual sex I think I take a more selfish approach and I don’t think afterwards ‘I could have charged x for that’ because it’s a very different experience. I have less recreational sex though now than before I was doing sex work. I tend to want to save the energy for the work, which I think is not necessarily a healthy approach! -
Jamie21 reacted to a post in a topic: Running into an acquaintance
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All I’d say is get one where the top doesn’t open unexpectedly in your bag 😱
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When does one bring up special requests or fetishes?
Jamie21 replied to + Skirader's topic in Questions About Hiring
Ask as early as possible and be straight up about it. It’s quite annoying to have clients act in a coy way by opening with “hi how are you” etc and then slowly circling around what they want. Much better to say “hi I’m looking for x and x etc are you ok with that? If so I’d like to book a session for duration on time, day etc”. Don’t be shy about stating anything you want, I’ve heard everything. -
I ran into a client at a naked beach in Mykonos one time. He was with his partner. It didn’t seem to be a problem.
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There’s really no excuse for it. Have a shower beforehand. In my experience though it’s rare. I can think of a few times clients haven’t been clean and I’ve simply not gone anywhere near their bum (even after discreetly wiping them).
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